Macavity

Macavity's a mystery cat, he's called the hidden paw
For he's the master criminal who can defy the law
He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair
For when they reach the scene of crime Macavity's not there!

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity
He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity
His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare
But when you reach the scene of crime Macavity's not there!
You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air
But I tell you once and once again Macavity's not there!

Macavity's a ginger cat, he's very tall and thin
You would know him if you saw him for his eyes are sunked in
His brow is deeply lined with thought, his head is highly domed
His coat is dusty from neglect, his whiskers are uncombed
He sways his head from side to side with movements like a snake
And when you think he's half asleep, he's always wide awake

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity
For he's a fiend in feline shape, a monster of depravity
You may meet him in a by-street, you may see him in the square
But when a crime's discovered then Macavity's not there!

He's outwardly respectable, I know he cheats at cards
And his footprints are not found in any files of Scotland Yard's

And when the larder's looted or the jewel case is rifled
Or when the milk is missing or another peke's been stifled
Or the greenhouse glass is broken and the trellis past repair
There's the wonder of the thing Macavity's not there!

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity
There never was a cat of such deceitfulness and suavity
He always has an alibi and one or two to spare
What ever time the deed took place Macavity's not there!

And they say that all the cats whose wicked deeds are widely known
I might mention Mungojerrie, I might mention Griddlebone
Are nothing more than agents for the cat who all the time
Just controls the operations: the Napolean of crime!

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity
He's a fiend in feline shape, a monster of depravity
You may meet him in a by-street, you may see him in the square
But when a crime's discovered then Macavity
Macavity, Macavity, Macavity

When a crime's discovered then Macavity's not there!

Old Deuteronomy

Old Deuteronomy's lived a long time;

He's a Cat who has lived many lives in succession.

He was famous in proverb and famous in rhyme

A long while before Queen Victoria's accession.

Old Deuteronomy's buried nine wives

And more - I am tempted to say, ninety-nine;

And his numerous progeny prospers and thrives

And the village is proud of him in his decline.

At the sight of that placid and bland physiognomy,

When he sits in the sun on the vicarage wall,

The Oldest Inhabitant croaks: `Well, of all ...

Things ... Can it be ... really! ... No! ... Yes! ...

Ho! hi!

Oh, my eye!

My sight may be failing, but yet I confess

I believe it is Old Deuteronomy!'



Old Deuteronomy sits in the street,

He sits in the High Street on market day;

The bullocks may bellow, the sheep they may bleat,

But the dogs and the herdsmen will turn them away.

The cars and the lorries run over the kerb,

Andthe villagers put up a notice: ROAD CLOSED -

So that nothing untoward may chance to disturb

Deuteronomy's rest when he feels so disposed

Or when he's engaged in domestic economy:

And the Oldest Inhabitant croaks: `Well, of all ...

Things ... Can it be ... really! ... No! ... Yes! ...

Ho! hi!

Oh, my eye!

I'm deaf of an ear now, but yeat I can guess

That the cause of the trouble is Old Deuteronomy!'



Old Deuteronomy lies on the floor

Of the fox and French Horn for his afternoon sleep;

And when the men say: `There's just time for one more,'

then the landlady from her back parlour will peep

And say: `Now then, out you go, by the back door,

For Old Deuteronomy mustn't be woken -

I'll have the police if there's any uproar' -

And out they all shuffle, without a work spoken.

The digestive repose of that feline's gastronomy

Must never be broken, whatever befall:

And the Oldest Inhabitant croaks: `Well of all ...

Things ... Can it be ... really! ... Yes! ... No! ...

Ho! hi!

Oh, my eye!

My legs may be tottery, I must go slow

And be careful of Old Deuteronomy!'

Ms.Mistoffelees

"You ought to ask Mr.Mistoffelees!

The Original Conjuring Cat -

The greatest magicians have something to learn

From Mr.Mistoffelees Conjuring Turn.



Presto!



And we all say: OH!

Well I never!

Was there ever

A Cat so clever

As Magical Mr.Mistoffelees!



OH!

Well I never!

Was there ever

A Cat so clever

As Magical Mr.Mistoffelees!



He is quiet and small, he is black

From his ears to the tip of his tail;

He can creep through the tiniest crack,

He can walk on the narrowest rail.

He can pick any card from a pack,

He is equally cunning with dice;

He is always deceiving you into believing

That he's only hunting for mice.

He can play any trick with a cork

or a spoon and a bit of fish-paste;

If you look for a knife or a fork

and you think it is merely misplaced -

You have seen it one moment; and then it is GAWN!

(But) you'll find it next week lying out on the lawn.



And we all say: OH!

Well I never!

Was there ever

A Cat so clever

As Magical Mr.Mistoffelees!



OH!

Well I never!

Was there ever

A Cat so clever

As Magical Mr.Mistoffelees!



His manner is vague and aloof,

You would think there was nobody shyer -

But his voice has been heard on the roof

When he was curled up by the fire.

And he's sometimes been heard by the fire

When he was about on the roof -

(At least we all HEARD that somebody purred)

Which is incontestable proof

Of his singular magical powers:

and I have known the family to call

Him in from the garden for hours,

while he was asleep in the hall.

And not long ago this phenomenal Cat

Produced SEVEN KITTENS right out of a hat!



And we all say: OH!

Well I never!

Was there ever a Cat so clever

As Magical Mr.Mistoffelees!

OH! Well I never!

Was there ever a Cat so clever

As Magical Mr.Mistoffelees!

OH! Well I never!

Was there ever a Cat so clever

As Magical Mr.Mistoffelees!

OH! Well I never!

Was there ever a Cat so clever

As Magical Mr.Mistoffelees!

OH! Well I never!

Was there ever a Cat so clever

As Magical Mr.Mistoffelees!

OH! Well I never!

Was there ever a Cat so clever

As Magical Mr.Mistoffelees!

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you...

Magical Mr.Mistoffelees!

Memory

Midnight, not a sound from the pavement 午夜，路上寂靜無聲
Has the moon lost her memory 月兒也失去記憶
She is smiling alone 她笑得多孤寂
In the lamplight 街燈下
The withered leaves collect at my feet 枯葉在我的脚下堆積
And the wind begins to moan 風兒也開始哀鳴


Memory, all alone in the moonlight 回憶，當我獨自在月光裏
I can smile at the old days 我的笑只在往昔
It was beautiful then那時多麼美麗
I remember the time I knew what happiness was 回憶當時才知快樂是什麼含義
Let the memory live again 讓回憶重新降臨

Every street lamp seems the best 每盏燈像是
A fatalistic warning 宿命的警訊
Someone mutters 某人喃喃低語
And a streetlamp gutter 街燈成排
And soon it will be morning 清晨就快來到
Daylight, I must wait for the sunrise 日光，我等待太陽升起
I must think of a new life 我要為未來思慮
And I mustn't give in 而我不能放棄
When the dawn comes 當黎明到來
Tonight will be a memory, too今夜也將要成為回憶
And a new day will begin 新的一天就要開始


Burnt out ends of smoky days 每日都像燃燒的煙霧
The stale, cold smell of morning 霉味充滿清晨空氣
The street lamp dies 街燈又熄
Another night is over又是一夜過去
Another day is dawning又將是一個黎明


Touch me, it's so easy to leave me 靠近我，離開我多麼容易
All alone with the memory of my days in the sun 讓我獨自回憶，回憶昨日美麗
If you touch me 如果你靠近
You'll understand what happiness is你將明瞭快樂的意義
Look! A new day has begun看！新的一天已經來臨

Mungojerrie And Rumpleteazer

Mungojerrie and Rumpelteazer
We're a notorious couple of cats
As knockabout clowns, quick-change comedians
Tight-rope walkers and acrobats
We have an extensive reputation
We make our home in Victoria Grove
This is merely our centre of operation
For we are incurably given to rove
We are very well known in Cornwall Gardens
In Launceston Place and in Kensington Square
We have really a little more reputation
Than a couple of cats can very well bear
If the area window is found ajar
And the basement looks like a field of war
If a tile or two comes loose on the roof
(Which presently fails to be waterproof)
If the drawers are pulled out from the bedroom chest
And you can't find one of your winter vests
If after supper one of the girls
Suddenly misses her Woolworth pearls
The family will say, "It's that horrible cat!
It was Mungojerrie or Rumpelteazer!"
And most of the time they leave it at that
Mungojerrie and Rumpelteazer have a very unusual gift of the gab
We are highly efficient cat burglars as well
And remarkably smart at a smash and grab
We make our home in Victoria Grove
We have no regular occupation
We are plausible fellows who like to engage
A friendly policeman in conversation
When the family assembles for Sunday dinner
With their minds made up that they won't get thinner
On Argentine joint, potatoes and greens
And the cook will appear from behind the scenes
And say in a voice that is broken with sorrow,
"I'm afraid you must wait and have dinner tomorrow!
For the joint has gone from the oven like that!"
The family will say, "It's that horrible cat!
It was Mungojerrie or Rumpelteazer!"
And most of the time they leave it at that
Mungojerrie and Rumpelteazer have a wonderful way of working together
And some of the time you would say it was luck
And some of the time you would say it was weather
We go through the house like a hurricane
And no sober person could take his oath
Was it Mungojerrie or Rumpelteazer?
Or could you have sworn that it mightn't be both?
And when you hear a dining room smash
Or up from the pantry there comes a loud crash
Or down from the library there comes a loud ping
From a vase that was commonly said to be Ming
The family will say: "Now which was which cat?
It was Mungojerrie and Rumpelteazer!"
And there's nothing at all to be done about that!

The Rum Tum Tugger

The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat
If you offer me pheasant I'd rather have grouse
If you put me in a house I would much prefer a flat
If you put me in a flat then I'd rather have a house
If you set me on a mouse then I only want a rat
If you set me on a rat then I'd rather chase a mouse
The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat
And there isn't any call for me to shout it
For he will do as he do do
And there's no doing anything about it!
The Rum Tum Tugger is a terrible bore
When you let me in, then I want to go out
I'm always on the wrong side of every door
And as soon as I'm at home, then I'd like to get about
I like to lie in the bureau drawer
But I make such a fuss if I can't get out
The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat
And it isn't any use for you to doubt it
For he will do as he do do
And there's no doing anything about it!
The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious beast
My disobliging ways are a matter of habit
If you offer me fish then I always want a feast
When there isn't any fish then I won't eat rabbit
If you offer me cream then I sniff and sneer
But I only like what I find for myself
So you'll catch me in it right up to my ears
If you put it away on the larder shelf
The Rum Tum Tugger is artful and knowing
The Rum Tum Tugger doesn't care for a cuddle
But I'll leap in your lap in the middle of your sewing
For there's nothing I enjoy like a horrible muddle!
The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat
The Rum Tum Tugger doesn't care for a cuddle
The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat
And there isn't any need for me to spout it
For he will do as he do do
And there's no doing anything about it!